Hogs vs eATMe——Baseball

[Gambler]

No Diggs.

[Borenutz]

Hello.  I'm from the Church of Dave Van Horn and Latter Day Sinners.  I'm here to tell you the good news about our lord and savior* Hagen Smith.  The good news is that the savior is pitching tonight against the animal abusing fake army weirdos from the University of Texas A&M.  He hath brought his mighty sword in the form of 98 mph dick heat to smite the wicked for their evil deeds with nonconsenting livestock.

Assisting Brother Smith in his ministry tonight are the following nine disciples:

1. Peyton Holt RF
2. Peyton Stovall 2B
3. Jared Sprague-Lott 3B
4. Wehiwa Aloy SS
5. Ben McLaughlin 1B
6. Ryder Helfrick DH
7. Hudson White C
8. Jayson Jones LF
9. Ty Wilmsmeyer CF

P. Hagen Smith

And the roster of evildoers from south of the border**.

1. Gavin Grahovac 3B
2. Jace LaViolette (French for "the violet") CF
3. Braden Montgomery RF
4. Jackson Appel C
5. Ted Burton 1B
6. Hayden Schott DH
7. Ali Camarillo SS
8. Caden Sorrell LF
9. Travis Chestnut (working to confirm reports that he's the love child of 1990s country singers Travis Tritt and Mark Chestnut...more on this later) 2B.

P. Ryan Prager WHP.








*I know he's not the real lord and savior, hence the lack of a capital L and S.  No blasphemy here.

**"the border" being the one running down State Line Avenue, as recognized by most of the civilized world.

Damn. You just gave me raisansnacks vibes

[DirkPiggler]

Damn. You just gave me raisansnacks vibes

I refuse to post pictures of the opponents' cheerleaders.

[Cardiac Hog]

No Diggs.

I Like the way u work it

[DirkPiggler]

Top 1st.

Holt strikes out looking. 1 out.

Stovall strikes out swinging at three straight. 2 outs.

Sprague-Lott strikes out swinging.  3 outs.

Mid 1st.  Hogs 0

[Sus-Scrofa]

Less than ideal start

[Cardiac Hog]

Dirk owes all of us a steak dinner

[BleedinRed]

Three strikeouts to start the game.  Hitting is going to be sparse tonight it appears.  

[Feral]

Woof.

Swinging and missing at everything.

[Gambler]

Weak at bat by SL.

[Feral]

Three strikeouts to start the game.  Hitting is going to be sparse tonight it appears. 

It's a Hagen start.

Our lineup always phones it in for those.

[DirkPiggler]

Bottom 1st.

Grahovac strikes out swinging. 1 out.

The Violet strikes out swinging.  2 outs.

Montgomery strikes out swinging.    3 outs.

THAT'S A STEAK DINNER WINNER!  CONGRATULATIONS TO @BleedinRed for being tonight's lucky winner of the privilege of buying a steak dinner for two for the play-by-play announcer of his choice.  As many of us live in different areas, gift certificates ($200 minimum) are acceptable substitutes for in-person dining. 


End 1st.  0-0.

[Barton Fink]

Stupid to start this game.

[Sus-Scrofa]

We're only going to get like two innings with Smith 

[Sus-Scrofa]

Stipid to atart this game.

Too many beers by first pitch?

[BleedinRed]

Right now Aggie is saying, "Three strikeouts to start the game.  Hitting is going to be sparse tonight it appears. "

[DirkPiggler]

Top 2nd.

Aloy grounds out weakly to the pitcher.  CONTACT!  1 out.

McLaughlin strikes out swinging. 2 outs.

Heflrick absolutely mashes one down the 3rd base line...fielded by the pitcher who has nothing he can do with it.  Infield hit.  Runner on 1st, 2 outs.

White singles to CF.  Runners 1st and 2nd, 2 outs.

Jones strikes out swinging. 3 outs.

Mid 2nd.  0-0.

[BleedinRed]

Why is Goodwin coaching 1st tonight?

[Barton Fink]

Too many beers by first pitch?

I wish. More worried about an injury. (to the players)

[Usafhawg]

Where's Wernes?